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Use the Restaurant to Your Advantage

by: Tasher

I may not be a man, but I will be the first to tell you that both men and women risk their safety when they go on a first date with a stranger. I would even go as far as to say that men are even slightly more at risk than women.

Why do I think that? Well, it has a lot to do with the fact that women are more cautious and careful when it comes to their safety. Women tend to do more to prepare for a blind date or a first date with a new person. Men approach the situation with a carefree attitude or they just do not see how a girl could ever cause them harm. But, I've heard some crazy stories about blind dates from some of my guy friends. Whether you are a girl or a guy, you can never be too careful.

Bring a friend/family member with you. Restaurants make a great location for a first date for a number of different reasons. First of all, there are lots of people around. Your date cannot really harm you in a room full of other people. It is also easy to have a friend or family member sitting in on your date without your date actually noticing. Just have them grab a seat close by. It'll also give you an opportunity to compare notes afterwards to see what they thought of your date as well.

Make someone aware of your situation. I can't always get a friend or family member to come on the date with me. When this happens I'll show up to the restaurant a little early and make a member of the staff such as the host or the waiter/waitress aware of my situation. All you have to do is let them know that you do not really know the person and would appreciate it if they would keep an eye on you and your date. I've used this technique more than a few times and it always works really well. The staff at one of the restaurants I like to use added a twist to letting them help me. If I feel that the date is uncomfortable / dangerous I am to ask them a question like “I hear a slight accent, where are you from? “ After reasonable amount of time I will let my date know I need to leave and thank him for the meal. Then the server will delay the payment of the bill…. until I am safely out of the parking lot. If for any reason the staff feels my date has issues they will tell me I need to talk to someone away from the table for some reason, like I have a phone “call” (sometimes cell phones don’t work)…. When I am away from the table they or another employee will tell me their concerns. I highly recommend if the staff is concerned and wants to tell you something it is very important you listen.

Be the center of attention. Anytime I go on a date with a stranger I do whatever I can to make sure that we are sitting as close to the middle of the room as possible. It makes me feel a little better and my date is less likely to try anything funny when there are witnesses all the way around them. At the very least, you should try to sit in an area of the restaurant where there are other guests enjoying their meals. As tempting as it may be to go off in the corner of the room or to sit away from the crowd, it is not a very good idea for your safety.

There is no such thing as being too careful when it comes to your own protection and safety. Furthermore, you should never let embarrassment stop you from going on a blind date or a date with a total stranger. There is nothing wrong with branching out and meeting new people, you just have to be smart about it.

Don't forget to show your appreciate and gratefulness to the staff of the restaurant that helped you through your first date. It isn't really in their job description to supervise blind dates, so there is nothing wrong with going out of your way to tell them thank you. I have a list of restaurants that have staff members that have always been willing to watch over me and help me out when I go on blind dates. I always make an effort to go back to the restaurant a few days after the date and thank them for their help. A small tip or some homemade cookies is always a nice touch.

Tasher, an experienced businesswoman. She founded and launched http://divorcedandscarednomore.com/ Divorced and Scared No More.com in November 2012. It quickly received a worldwide following. Her website has over 20 regular contributors who, like Tasher, share because they have “been there and done that” and understand how it FEELS. She is a contributing expert for  http://hopeafterdivorce.org/ HopeAfterDivorce.org http://familyshare.com/ FamilyShare.com http://www.cupidspulse.com/ CupidsPulse.com, http://www.ocregister.com/ Orange County Register, http://goodmenproject.com/author/tasher/ The Good Men Project, http://www.sassysinglemom.com/ SingleSassyMom.com, Guest Co-Host on http://www.divorcesourceradio.com/podcast-archive/, Single Again Now What, and does guest appearances on http://www.blogtalkradio.com/bsquared, Developing a New YOU. Tasher is also involved with the http://toughangels.org/who-we-are/ Tough Angels Organizations, http://toughangels.org/wedding-ring-project/, Rings of Hope Project. Tasher is single, a mother of three adult children, and a proud Grammy to three grandchildren. She lives in Texas with her daughter, two grandchildren, two dogs, two cats, two fish and a bunny. You can follow Tasher on FB https://www.facebook.com/DivoredAndScaredNoMore, Divorced and Scared NO More and Twitter https://twitter.com/Divorced_Scared @Divorced_Scared.

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